% DocTitle="Letter to Advertisers Concerning their Sponsorship of the August 16th Roast of Pamela Anderson on Comedy Central" %>
Letter to Advertisers Concerning their Sponsorship of the August 16th Roast of Pamela Anderson on Comedy Central
September 6, 2005
In the annals of insipid and mindlessly, unapologetically vulgar entertainment, Comedy Central's roast of Pamela Anderson marks a low point. The Pamela Anderson roast featured a roster of mostly unknown comedians telling extremely dirty jokes, each trying to be more shocking and outrageous than the last. Just so you can see for yourself just how graphic this content is, I have included below a summary of just some of the vulgar jokes and disgusting comments that were shared in "honoring" Pamela Anderson's career on the program underwritten by Partnership for a Drug Free America.
The Comedy Central roast came into two-thirds of US households as part of their basic cable package. And lest you think the late night airings kept the youngest members of the family from watching, according to Nielsen Media Research, nearly 15% of the audience for the Comedy Central roast was under the age of 18.
In this new age of corporate responsibility, poor decisions with ad dollars can easily affect a company's bottom line. In addition, many parents and families are starting to equate corporate ads with corporate endorsements of programs. At some point, the light may dawn in the minds of Partnership for a Drug Free America business executives who will realize they are risking their company's reputation by sponsoring this raunchy and vulgar programming that is wholly unsuitable for children and strikingly at odds with their corporate brand.
We realize that you might not be aware of the messages with which your corporation is being associated. And we sincerely want to help you reach your target audience through programs which reflect your corporate values and hard-earned brand equity. That's why the Parents Television Council has provided for you "The PTC's Family TV Guide" which can be found at http://www.parentstv.org. This website contains a most comprehensive analysis of primetime network television programming content, and it is the only content-based television guide in existence. We urge you to use this free resource as a means to make more informed media purchases.
I hope that civic duty and corporate responsibility – not to mention good sense and taste – are reflected in your future advertising decisions. Business leaders like you must be mindful of the messages you are paying for with your advertising dollars.
Please do not hesitate to call me if you have any questions. I am
available to discuss this important issue with you.
Jimmy: Pam has two boys, "...boys that when they were born actually walked out of her vagina."
Greg: "Courtney, what the hell happened to you..., and your career dried up quicker that Sarah Silverman's [partially bleeped pussy]..."
Nick: "Pam's the perfect physical specimen, with that silky skin, that blond hair, those pouty pink lips, and that's just her [partially bleeped snatch]."
Nick: "I masturbated to that show [Baywatch] so many times I used to pay a homeless guy to stand next to my TV with a squeegee."
Nick: "If you only knew how many times I [partially bleeped ejaculated] on your face, I thought the only way I was going to recognize you was if I just ran into you after you ate a glazed donut."
Jeffrey: "I'm not saying Pam's vagina is as big as the Lincoln Tunnel, I'm saying it's bigger. It opened wider than 'Revenge of the Sith.' You've got to go to Mapquest to find her G-Spot. Is it true that they give free donkey rides to the bottom?"
Jeffrey to Anna Nichole: "Somebody get her a ninety-year-old [partially bleeped cock] to suck on please.
Courtney: "Just last week... I was sodomized without a condom... and just my luck I lost the guy's number."
Courtney: "The other day she [Pam] sat on my sunglasses and broke them, but it was my fault because I was wearing them at the time."
Jimmy: "Our next performer is where I put my penis when I'm thinking about Pamela Anderson. She is one of only two people in the room who have given me a [partially bleeped blow] job, that's right I'm talking to you Corolla [Adam]. "
Tommy is describing the first time he and Pam met. He says that the first thing Pam ever said to him was, "I will [partially bleeped fuck] any drummer."
Tommy: "The closest I've ever seen her come to animal cruelty was the time she shaved her [partially bleeped pussy]."
Lisa on Pam's dating: "...her life story should be a show on VH1 called 'I [partially bleeped fucked] the ‘80s.'"