The Girls of Hedsor Hall is the latest in a long line of “etiquette” reality shows where uncouth and unrefined harlots learn some manners.  Think of it as “Girls Gone Mild.”   The show’s premise, however, is as disingenuous as the contestants themselves.  While the show claims to reform bad girls, it is merely yet another format to exploit young women.  For this hypocrisy, The Girls of Hedsor Hall has been named Worst Cable TV Show of the Week.

In the series finale, the field of twelve has been whittled down to the last two contestants: Brianna and Kimberley.  Of course, the episode contains the obligatory “look back” at each girl’s journey from tramp to lady.  From the footage it is clear that the girls don’t need charm school; they need therapy and/or rehab. 

Kimberley came to Hedsor Hall as the alcoholic party girl.  She is shown on the sidewalk in front of a bar, exposing her thong underwear and gyrating wildly while in voice-over she explains, “I like drinking and I love after drinking and I love being drunk.”  Footage is shown of Kimberley making out with a prone woman on top of a bar.  She cracks open a beer cap with her teeth and drains a wine bottle down her gullet.  She admits to drinking everyday and ignoring help from her loved ones. 

Brianna’s journey was even tawdrier.  The self-proclaimed “nymphomaniac” from New Jersey worked as a stripper who performed sex acts on her website.  She explains, “What I do for my profession is, I basically strip and masturbate on the computer and people pay per minute.”  Apparently, her entire lifestyle was toxic.  “It wasn’t only the job,” she explains, “It was the drugs.  It was the alcohol.  It was guys wanting to have sex with me and doing stuff to me.”  During the course of the show she promises that she will never go back to that life.

The show itself, though, is exploitative.  The camera loves to linger on the girls as they change into various outfits, stripping down to their bra and underwear.  In one shot, the camera actually zooms on Brianna’s torso as she removes her bra to squeeze into an evening gown.  On the one hand, the show’s hosts decry the fact that she strips for a living – then, minutes later, the show gives viewers a striptease.

For their final task, the girls must deliver a speech explaining what they’ve learned at Hedsor Hall.  Yet, when the girls assert that they’ve changed, it is difficult to gauge their sincerity when a $100,000 prize is on the line.  Moreover, these shows might reward the winner with prize money, but more often than not, the most recalcitrant losers are usually the ones that end up with reality show careers.  No one knows this more than the show’s host – Tara Conner (the disgraced former Miss USA who was nearly dethroned due to cocaine, alcohol abuse and risqué behavior).  She’s gone on to appear in three different reality shows.  

The Girls of Hedsor Hall will no doubt live on in marathons and repeats for the foreseeable future.  And viewers can once again be reminded of the hypocritical exploitation that has garnered it the title of Worst Cable TV Show of the Week.