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Guy Presents: Seth and Alex’s Almost Live Comedy Showon Fox
Kudos to Microsoft for
pulling its sponsorship of Family Guy Presents: Seth and Alex’s Almost Live
Comedy Show. Upon viewing the live taping of the show prior to broadcast,
Microsoft decided that MacFarlane’s brand of tasteless, raunchy humor didn’t fit
with their corporate branding. Unfortunately, Warner Brothers did eventually step
up to become the sole sponsor of the half-hour sleaze-fest and the show sadly
did air without a hitch. So what exactly did Warner Brothers pay for? Disgusting
sex jokes, crass Holocaust humor, cruel impersonations of deaf people, and loads
of bleeped profanity. Basically, Warner Brothers paid a pretty penny for the Worst TV Show of the Week.
Essentially, the special was
a lame excuse to have Family Guy, American Dad and Cleveland Show
creator Seth MacFarlane and voice-actress Alex Borstein (who plays Lois Griffin
on Family Guy) sing show tunes, backed by a forty-piece orchestra, in front of a
live audience. In between their performances, pre-taped sketches were shown,
including one where Peter presides over “family time” in the Griffin household.
Peter poses the question, “Okay, here's one, you guys. You can have sex with
one celebrity. Who's it gonna be?”
As each member of the family
chooses the celebrity he or she would like to have sex with, Meg decides she’d
sleep with Star Wars robot C-3PO, explaining, “Yeah, he seems like he'd
be smart and kinda gentle.”
“Gentle?” Lois counters,
“Meg, you sleep with him, he'd cut you open like a tin can.”
“Well, maybe that's what I
like! You guys don't know me!” Meg screams before she storms off.
After a beat, Peter randomly
says, “So, we all go pleasure ourselves in separate rooms and come back in ten?”
“Sounds good to me,” Lois
proclaims while Chris remains motionless at the foot of the couch, playing a
“Hey, what about Chris?”
Lois explains, “Oh, he
already finished about 16 times today.”
Masturbating in separate
rooms is what passes as family bonding in the Griffin household.
If it wasn’t this truly
disturbing scene that sent the Microsoft folks fleeing, perhaps it was Seth’s
rendition of “Edelweiss” from TheSound of Music. In the middle
of his performance Alex objects, stating that as a Jew whose mother and
grandmother barely escaped the Nazis, she cannot in good conscience stand back
and let Seth sing that song, given the Austrians’ terrible treatment of Jews
during World War II. Seth points out, “Had none of that ever happened, how many
female Jewish comedians would you be competing with in Hollywood? Right now
it’s just you and Sarah Silverman.” Alex subsequently breaks into the song’s
Maybe the reps at Microsoft
squirmed at the sight of Kermit the Frog auditioning for Tom Hanks’ role in
Philadelphia. The Muppet beloved by children everywhere is shown uttering
the lines, “You're firing me? It’s because I have AIDS, isn't it? You're
firing me because I'm a homosexual man with AIDS.”
Or maybe the people behind
Windows 7 slammed the door in McFarlane’s face when Alex performed a truly
cheap, tasteless impersonation of deaf actress Marlee Matlin singing Lady Gaga’s
hit, “Pokerface.” The sketch was only slightly salvaged by Matlin herself when
she stepped on stage and cracked wise about Alex’sobesity. But as Matlin flipped off Alex and shouted, “[bleeped “F***”]
you!” before she stormed off-stage, one couldn’t help but feel sad over the fact
that Matlin had stooped to MacFarlane’s level.
The night ended with a
blatant ploy to promote MacFarlane’s toxic spin-off The Cleveland Show.
Whenever an expletive needed to be censored, an audio clip of Cleveland saying
his own name replaced the familiar “bleep” sound. What ensued was an
incomprehensible string of “Cleveland”s. Here’s a snippet of the transcript:
ALEX: “Okay, wait, so I can
say also like if you were a South African hermaphrodite runner you very well
could have a [Cleveland] and a [Cleveland]?”
SETH: “Ooo, exotic. And if
you were flexible, you could curl your [Cleveland] around your [Cleveland], wash
it off and then start in on your [Cleveland] ‘til you [Cleveland], you got your
two hands free to just [Cleveland, Cleveland] ‘til they [Cleveland] on your
ALEX: “Okay, are we done?
Because I'm about to [Cleveland] my [Cleveland].”
Given the final ratings, it
appears the folks at Microsoft weren’t the only ones that thought the special
wasn’t worth their time. It roundly lost its timeslot to all the other major
networks. Perhaps in the future, when MacFarlane needs someone to subsidize his
Broadway fantasies, more companies will know to stay well away.
For crass humor, sexually
explicit dialogue, and vulgar profanity, Family Guy Presents: Seth and Alex’s
Almost Live Comedy Show has been named Worst TV Show of the Week.
Parents Television Council,
Clean Up TV Now, Because our children are watching, The
nation's most influential advocacy organization, Protecting
children against sex, violence and profanity in
entertainment, Parents Television Council Seal of Approval,
and Family Guide to Prime Time Television
are trademarks of the Parents Television Council.