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Worst TV Show of the Week

American Dad on Fox

Just in time for the holidays, Sony Pictures’ Arthur Christmas is about to hit theaters. And to get the word out, the family-friendly feature sponsored the animation block of programming this past Sunday night on Fox. On the face of it, this makes sense. Of course you’d want to advertise a 3-D animated movie on a block of animated shows. But the similarities end there. Apparently on Fox, flirting with incest counts as family-focused entertainment. Why Sony would want to be associated with the Worst TV Show of the Week is a bit perplexing, but that’s exactly what happened.

The episode’s opening scenes introduce the plot’s central premise: the CIA possesses Avatar technology. Just like in the blockbuster movie, agents can virtually control a host body. One agent’s avatar is a large African American man referred to as Black Dick. Deputy Director Bullock explains, “That's his avatar, Black Dick. I realize that name is a rich joke area, but curb yourself people. This isn’t' junior high. Although Black Dick is huge and veiny.”

The Avatar set-up becomes pivotal once Stan realizes that he has missed out on most of his son Steve’s life and it’s too late to make up for it because as his wife Fran puts it, “Steve's at the age where he doesn't care about going to a ballgame with his dad. All he's interested in is girls. He doesn't want ballgames he just wants to ball dames.” As a result, Stan embodies an avatar he knows will pique Steve’s interest. Enter Phyllis, the attractive new girl to Pearl Bailey High School, who is oddly forward about befriending Steve, who of course wants to be more than friends. When Steve senses that Phyllis doesn’t feel the same way, he turns his attention to a more viable candidate. In desperation, Phyllis – actually Stan – proclaims to Steve, “If you go to the dance with me, I'll have sex with you.” Steve gladly takes out his day planner which has “whack it” written into every day. Steve crosses out Friday’s “whack it” session and scribbles “sex” above it.

For Saturday, again he crosses out "Whack It" and writes "Aids Test!"     

Bullock is beside himself when he hears what Stan has gotten himself into.

Bullock: This is sick, man. Are you really going to go through with this?

Stan: I've already missed so much of Steve's life. This way I get to keep hanging out with him. Plus, I get to be there for his biggest milestone ever - losing his virginity.

Bullock: To you, you idiot! Have you even thought this through?

Stan: Look, fathers take their sons to whorehouses to lose their virginity all the time. This is almost just like that except I will be locked in eye contact with my son while he plows my cyber-soil.

At the dance, Stan…er, Phyllis…dances seductively with Steve. He escorts Phylli-Stan to an empty classroom decorated like a love den. But before they have sex, Fran barges in to save the day. 

This isn’t the first time American Dad has flirted with incest. In one episode from a few seasons back, Stan’s CIA body-double dated his daughter, Hayley. Fran walked in on them making out in her bedroom and vomited at the mere sight of Hayley in bed with her father.

What was most appalling about the latest episode (as if incest wasn’t appalling enough) was the fact that the entire block of Sunday programming was sponsored by Sony Pictures’ holiday 3-D animated feature, Arthur Christmas. In fact, an extended sneak preview aired during the first commercial break of the November 20th episode. Why else would Sony air a preview at that time? Because they know that despite Seth MacFarlane’s insistence that his cartoons are for adults, their target audience is actually kids.  

For yet another disgusting, incestuous storyline, American Dad rightfully deserves the title Worst TV Show of the Week (brought to you by Sony).