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Basic Cable Awash in Raunch
A Content Analysis of expanded basic cable's Original Prime-Time Series

November 2004


"It's tough to get that sexual point of view across on television. Hopefully I have made it possible for somebody on broadcast television to do a rear-entry scene in three years. Maybe that will be my legacy." – Ryan Murphy, Creator of the pornographic FX series Nip/Tuck

 

Cable began as an alternate television service to households where reception of over-the-air TV signals was poor, and has since expanded into a multi-billion dollar industry.  Between traditional cable service and satellite television, most basic cable channels reach upwards of 85% Americans, making advertiser-supported basic cable nearly as pervasive as broadcast television. With so little family programming available on the broadcast networks, it's no surprise that millions of parents choose to subscribe to some kind of basic cable package in order to gain access to wholesome and educational programming available on a handful of cable networks.  But to access these networks, parents are also forced to pay for channels they don't want and that actually make their job as a parent much more difficult.  Now, in addition to trying to protect their children from the filth on Fox, NBC, UPN, and the other broadcast networks, they also have to try to protect their children from the much more explicit fare on MTV, FX, Comedy Central, and the like.

Offering parents the ability to choose the channels they want, and to pay only for those channels, puts power back in the hands of the consumer and forces the producers of indecent or violent programming to fund their own raunch.  These morally degrading networks have been carried on the backs of American consumers long enough.  It is time for this extortion to end.

CABLE CONTENT

The following examples are taken from a broad range of cable channels that are part of most basic or expanded basic cable packages.  The programs listed below aired during all times of day, from early in the afternoon to late at night. 

OBSCENE LANGUAGE

Laguna Beach - MTV - 10/26/04

Kristin, drunk, dances on a pole on a table in the bar.  Steven gets mad at her. 

Steven: "What the [bleeped ‘fuck's'] your deal, bitch?  Hey, get up on the bar.  You look real good, slut."

Kristin: "Get off… Leave me alone!  Leave me the [bleeped ‘fuck'] alone."

Steven: "Look at you, slut!  Oh my god! … What's up, slut?  Don't [bleeped ‘fucking'] even try to go out on me.  You and me, completely done.  You're such a [bleeped ‘fucking'] ho."

Kristin: "Don't try to call me, you [bleeped ‘fucker'].  [Bleeped ‘Fuck'] you, Steven!"

Hugh Heffner Roast – Comedy Central     4/25/01

Jeffrey: "I don't want to shake your hand, I just want to shake your [bleeped ‘cock']."

Artie: "Heff, I smell [bleeped ‘pussy'], did you burp?"

The Anna Nicole Show – E!             8/18/02

Howard: That's bull [bleeped ‘shit']! That's bull [bleeped ‘shit']!

Anna: What are you all pissed for?

Howard: You swear you didn't throw-up?

Anna: No! Howard, [bleeped ‘fuck'] you! If you can't trust me, what the [bleeped ‘fuck'] are you doing in my life? ...If you can't trust me, get the [bleeped ‘fuck'] out of my life.

Howard: If you want me out, I'll get out.

Anna: I want you out because you can't [bleeped ‘fucking'] trust me. ...I ain't throwing anything out of proportion. You're sitting here calling me a [bleeped ‘fucking'] liar. You're one! I quit!

Howard: Fine Anna. You do win. You get what you want.

Anna: This is bull [bleeped ‘shit']!

Howard: It's total bull [bleeped ‘shit']!

Anna: You're bull [bleeped ‘shit']!

Howard: Fine! I'm bull [bleeped ‘shit'].

Anna: Howard, I didn't throw-up. For you to say that I did, you're a [bleeped ‘fucking'] asshole!

South Park– Comedy Central        3/19/03

Sean: "The internet, it's like a hotbed for your gay sex...chicks with dicks and men with tits, it's really bad...."

Franco: "These are chicks goddamn it, okay? ..Chicks with tits.  Trust me. The only dicks involved in the equation will be yours and mine... "

Sean: "...Let's just make sure ...they don't have adam's apples or anything...or even, you know, cocks." 

South Park– Comedy Central        06/20/2001 

Cartman: "Tonight, on Cop Drama, on TV, they're gonna say, shit."

Kyle: "They're gonna say shit on television?"

Stan: "You can't say shit on television!"

Cartman: "People are freaking out, dude."

Stan: "Holy [bleeped ‘fucking'] shit."

South Park the Movie: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut – Comedy Central 10/23/04

Comedy Central has aired this R-rated movie several times, unedited.  The film, which only narrowly avoided an NC-17 rating by the MPAA, contains over 130 uses of "fuck." Other foul-language used in the film includes, "pig fucker," "butt fucking S.O.B.," "Horse fucker," etc…

Season on the Brink – ESPN          3/10/02

Knight: "What the fuck are you doing out there? …Get the fuck out of my sight… Get the hell out of my face.  What the fuck is going on in your head?  Get the fuck out of my sight.  Fuck Darryl Thomas.  Fuck him. Three years working with the son of a bitch… You haven't hit an inside basket since Jesus Christ was lecturing in Omaha… Get in the fucking locker room.  Haven't done a goddamn thing since we've been here."

Knight: "Fuck!  Fuck!  Fuck!  Fuck!  You fucking guys…"

Knight: "You're the worst fucking pussy I've ever seen…"

Knight: "You are a fucking pussy from the top of your head to the bottom of your goddamn feet.  That's my assessment of you after three goddamn years, Darryl.  A fucking pussy.  The rest of you are no goddamn better… I don't give a damn what you do.  Get him out of here.  Get him the fuck out."

Knight: "You guys think I was a prick last year?"

EXPLICIT DIALOGUE

Striperella – SPIKE TV                     7/3/03

TV talk show host Sally Rose reaches across her desk, grabs Striperella's hand, and caresses her face with it.

Sally: "So, tell me… a woman with such beautiful features – luscious lips, supple breasts, firm, lickable thighs – you must get a lot of action."

Sex and the City - TBS                     6/29/04

Samantha calls Carrie and tells her about her night having sex with Jon.  During their conversation there are flashes of Samantha and Jon having sex.

Samantha: "I am so wiped… I mean, literally, I've been done every way you can be done… We did it with him on top, me on top, me on my side..."

Carrie: "Him on his side?"

Samantha: "Oh God, yes.  On his back, all over him.  Have you ever done that?  Well, do it immediately, it was fabulous.  These guys in their 20s, they're up for anything… I didn't sleep at all."

South Park the Movie: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut  Comedy Central 10/23/04

Stan asks Chef (a cafeteria worker) "How do you make a woman like you..." the adult says "You just have to find the clitoris."  Stan sets out to find out what a clitoris is.  He tries looking it up on the internet and ends up visiting a pornographic website.

South Park– Comedy Central        8/1/01

Mr. Garrison: "Ok children, now I want to review the different sexual positions.  Who can tell me which sexual positions we talked about?"

The tiny little kindergarten kids volunteer answers.

"Missionary position."

Mr. Garrison: "Missionary position, good a little boring, but tried and true."

"Doggie."

Mr. Garrison: "That's right, doggie style we went over."

"Pile driver."

Mr. Garrison: "Uh-huh, the pile driver position, good, Quake."

"The filthy sanchez?"

Mr. Garrison: "Yes good Flora, you remembered the filthy sanchez."

"Hot Carl?"

Mr. Garrison: "Yes, you can give your partner the old hot Carl, sure."

South Park– Comedy Central        8/1/01

Mr. Mackey and Ms. Choksondik are working on their lesson plans again at her house.

Mr. Mackey: "So apparently the lesson plan for tomorrow is supposed to involve the secretion of bodily fluids."

Mr. Mackey suggests they should come up with an alternative lesson plan.

Ms. Choksondik: "Something about how nerve endings play an important part in intercourse.

Mr. Mackey: "Right, right, like in the nipples."

Ms. Choksondik: "Or the shaft of the penis."

Mr. Mackey: "It says here that the head of the penis is actually the most sensitive part."

Ms. Choksondik: "Oh yes, the nerve endings are at the most concentrated at the tip of the penis like they are in the clitoris of the woman."

Mr. Mackey: "These are the two areas most important to sexual stimulation."

They kiss.

Mr. Mackey: "I've been thinking about you a lot Ms. Choksondik."

Ms. Choksondik: "Oh yeah, what do you do when you think about me?"

Mr. Mackey: "I go crazy."

Ms. Choksondik: "Do you touch yourself?"

Mr. Mackey: "Yeah."

They both take their shirts off.  Ms. Choksondik's animated breasts are briefly visible.  Ms. Choksondik takes off Mr. Mackey's jeans and his underwear.   He takes off her underwear.  They are shown from the waist up, but shown throwing the underwear across the room after bending out of   sight to remove them from each other.  He performs oral sex on her.

Ms. Choksondik: "It's your turn."

She kneels in front of him to give him oral sex.

Ms. Choksondik: "Do you want me?"

Mr. Mackey: "I do."

Ms. Choksondik: "Tell me."

Mr. Mackey: "I want you."

Ms. Choksondik: "Wait, wait, wait, do you have a condom?"

Mr. Mackey: "No."

Ms. Choksondik: "Oh well, [bleeped "fuck"] it."

They have sex on the floor, out of sight.

Ms. Choksondik: "Oh god, give it to me."

Mr. Mackey: "Yeah."

Ms. Choksondik: "That's it, that's it."

Mr. Mackey: "Oh, it feels so good.  Mmmm.."

STRIPPERS/NUDITY

Wild Boyz - MTV                               10/30/03

Chris and Steve watch a Baboon playing with its penis.

Chris: "Sometimes man's mere presence can spoil a baboon's erection in a matter of seconds."

Steve: "Maybe if we pull out our wieners, he'll be more comfortable."

Steve and Chris pull out their penises in front of the baboon. 

Striperella – SPIKE TV                     6/26/03

Opening credits involve Striperella stripping to a theme song that describes her as a "Playboy cutie, 0069."  There are close-ups of her breasts and buttocks, as well as a close-up of her removing her underwear that is immediately followed by the launch of a large rocket.  At the end, her bra flies off her body at the camera. 

Erotica comes out and begins to strip.  She begins by bending backwards on the pole and rubbing her hand over her upper body.  Then she turns and comes to squat in front of a man's face.  His head is between her legs and she thrusts her crotch at him.  Her shirt is laced up the front, she is showing a lot of cleavage, and her nipples are visible through the fabric.  As she dances, the men become more and more excited.  One man is receiving a lap dance with the stripper facing him, straddling his lap.  He pushes her aside to watch Erotica strip.  Erotica returns to the pole and begins pumping her buttocks, with thong visible, up and down in the air.  Erotica runs her hands down her neck and onto her breasts, she caresses her breasts, then removes the laces holding her top together.

The Anna Nicole Show – E!  9/8/02 

Anna and her assistant Kimmy are watching the Chippendale dancers. A stripper unzips his pants and turns so his backside faces the audience. He is wearing a thong and his naked buttocks are blurred. The stripper is pulling his thong down and the full buttocks are blurred. He is now nude. Another stripper is dancing seductively in front of Anna while she drinks her champagne and rubs his chest.

Anna: "There was a male strip club in Texas and, um, they were doing dances for us, the girls, and I just love to have males dancing around. It really makes me hot."

One naked stripper is showing pouring water on himself. His buttocks are blurred also. Another stripper is slapping a woman's buttocks. One man is standing behind a woman thrusting his pelvis from behind into a woman. Another man is rubbing a woman down the sides of her body. One stripper is shown in the center of a circle thrusting his pelvis into a woman. Another man's naked buttocks are blurred. 

Anna: "They were bringing women up on stage acting like they were doing them and stuff."

One of the strippers pulls Anna on stage. They sit her in a chair and sing a song for her.  A man (dressed as an electrician or plumber) begins dancing in front of her. He places her hands on his buttocks and continues dancing. Another stripper places Anna's hands on her chest and jiggles her breasts.

Anna: "We wasn't tired so we wanted to go see some girl strippers. So we went to this new club called Jaguars."  Anna dances with a pole (like the strippers) because the strippers asked her to. One stripper's bare chest is shown, but it is blurred.

Kimmy is receiving a lap dance from one of the strippers. The stripper's bare chest is blurred. Kimmy rubs the woman's thigh and grabs onto it.  Another stripper is bouncing up and down on Kimmy's lap while Kimmy slaps her buttocks. All of the strippers are topless (their breasts are blurred).  Howard is also receiving a lap dance and rubbing the woman's thighs. The woman reaches down between Howard's legs to rub his penis.

One woman is wearing a thong and Howard slaps her buttocks while she is giving him a lap dance. Anna receives a lap dance and the stripper is rubbing Anna's breasts.

Anna: "Boobs everywhere!"

The woman rubs her hand between her legs. It is hard to tell if she is rubbing her own or Anna's genitalia.

One of the strippers wanted to show Anna her fake breasts and Anna says, "I love your titties (bleeped)." Anna is feeling the stripper's naked breasts and so is Howard. Three women are on Howard's lap, gyrating against and touching him and one another in an orgiastic pile.  Two women are lying across Anna's lap while another slaps their bare bottoms.  Strippers are shown rubbing each other's breasts. Anna is shown slapping a stripper's bare buttocks.  Another stripper grabs Anna's breast.  Howard is shown grabbing a stripper's breast.

Anna and Howard are grinding their pelvises into each other as though they are having sex.  Both are clothed.  Howard grabs Anna's breast.  Anna is sitting on a couch with some of the strippers.  Howard is dancing in front of them, rubbing his genitals.  Two strippers are giving Anna a lap dance on the couch.

 MASTURBATION

Sex and the City - TBS - 7/20/04

Charlotte and Carrie are in yoga class and whispering.

Charlotte: "I think I broke my vagina...  With the rabbit [vibrator]."

Carrie: "Oh, so you've been using it?"

Charlotte: "Yes! I'm scared if I keep using it, I'll never be able to enjoy sex with a man again…  Have you ever been with a man, you know, and he's like, he's doing everything and it feels good but somehow you just can't manage to..."

Carrie: "Come?"

Charlotte: "Shhh, Yeah, what's weird, cause like, with the rabbit, it's like, every time, boom! And one time, I came for like, 5 minutes! …No man ever did that."

Carrie: "Well, you could still enjoy sex with a man and the rabbit."

Nip/Tuck – FX 8/3/04

Adrian: "You wanna jerk off or something?"

Matt: "What?"

Adrian: "Before the old lady comes back?  Relax?  I gotta take it when I can get it.  There's no locks in the house and the only privacy I can get is out here when she's in there."

Matt: "Yeah well, it's not appropriate and don't ask me that again."

Adrian: "Right, you need to save your load for my mom, anyway."

Hugh Heffner Roast – Comedy Central     4/25/01

Jimmy Kimmel: "When I think of Hugh Heffner, what comes to mind is rubbing my dong until it squirts.  He is an inspiration to masturbation.  He's the George Washington of jacking-off.  I could go on and on, but what can you say about Heff that hasn't already been mumbled incoherently by thousands of young women with his [bleeped ‘cock'] in their mouth?  And still, despite his age, one woman alone can not satiate Heff's sexual appetite.  Look at this table.  This man has seven girlfriends and no erections.  Viagra isn't just keeping you hard, it's keeping you alive.  I've read just about every issue of Playboy since I was 15-years-old, and not once did I see a Playmate list as one of her turn-ons [bleeped ‘fucking'] a 75-year-old man."

Adam Carolla: "My dad told me he was forced to beat-off to a charcoal drawing of a vagina on a piece of driftwood.  My grandfather had a sadder tale.  He said he would drop his pants and lay in a field until a cloud came along in the shape of a tit."

South Park the Movie: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut – Comedy Central  10/23/04

Satan and Saddam Hussein are presented as homosexual lovers in Hell. As such, we see them in bed watching TV. Saddam tells him, "You know how to turn my crank...I'm getting so hot." We then see Saddam rhythmically moving his hand at his crotch under the covers. Satan then asks him if sex is the only thing that matters to him. Saddam then replies that they should shut off the lights and get close. As the lights go off, we hear some brief sexually related sounds and Saddam saying, "You like that, don't you bitch?"

Later, Saddam tells Satan, "I don't know if I can sleep, if you know what I mean" and then adds "Let's fuck." He then reaches under the covers and pulls out a detached penis (actually a picture of a real one, not a cartoon drawing). He then pulls out another one and throws it over at Satan. 

The Man Show– Comedy Central  2/23/03

Episode contains a parody of a Time/Life commercial for a book series on the history of pornography.

Host: "A world of peril.  A century of crisis.  A nation rises to greatness, and through it all, there was creamy, satisfying porn.  [A woman in black lingerie is shown rubbing the insides of her thighs and her buttocks.] Decade after decade of spunk-covered decade of shameless filth, woven into the jizz-stained fabric of American culture, and now you can own it all.  Welcome to the wondrous world of pornography [a collection of books is shown with titles including A Hole New World, Pubes (which shows a woman shaving her crotch on the cover), Fists of Fury, Hurts So Good],  from The Man Show and the Publishers of Prime-Life Books.

"From prehistoric cave drawings of Neanderthal women pleasuring the Wooly Mammoth [we see a cave drawing of a woman with a Wooly Mammoth's trunk in her mouth] to cutting-edge 21st century virtual dildonics [we see a man in his underwear gyrating while watching porn through his virtual reality head gear], this multi-volume set is your guide to porn. With all its richness and history and fluids and stuff.  The 15-volume wondrous world of porn takes you on a journey from the bell-bottoms, tube socks, and coke-whores of the ‘70s to the double-anal years of the late ‘90s [Close-up of a woman's face.  Her mouth is open wide and she is cross-eyed.  Caption under the picture says "Ouch"]

"Volume 2, the pioneers, those delightful vaginas of yesteryear [Book cover with the subtitle "Legendary Labia" is shown], and you'll meet their donkey-schlonged male counterparts in Volume 3: "Angry, Purple, and Veiny." [Book cover shows a man with what looks like a salami sticking out of his underpants.  Subtitle of the book reads "King Dong."] [Package is shown sitting on a doorstep with a sticker that reads "100% Pure Porn!!! Open immediately and masturbate]…

"On every lavishly-illustrated page, you'll find old friends and surprising facts. [Man and woman are shown reading a book called "When Harry Met Gary" which depicts two men hugging on the cover. Woman's head disappears behind the book, implying that she is performing oral sex on the man.]

"Each volume is handsomely bound in elegant latex and treated with spank resistant scotch-guard.  [A white liquid substance lands on the cover of one of the books and is wiped-away with a napkin.]  When life says no, porn says yes.  And we want you to say yes to this special offer. Order now and you'll receive The Money Shot [cover shows a woman with her mouth open.  Subtitle is ‘Mr. Load's Wild Ride.'] 

"…Call now. Don't you owe it to your penis? I'm going to settle up with my guy, right now." [The host of the show is standing sideways with a very visible erection in his pants.]

At the end of the commercial, Adam says he bought two sets, one for him, one for his godchild.

South Park– Comedy Central 8/1/01

Cartman masturbates his dog, saying the 5th graders told him how to "milk his dog."  The dog ejaculates into Cartman's face.

Eric repeats the phrase "red rocket" over and over again as he masturbates his dog.

Stan: "Cartman, what the hell are you doing?"

Eric: "I'm milking the dog.  They make dog milk."

Kyle: "No they don't." 

Eric: "Yeah, hold on a minute, the fifth graders showed us how to do it. Red rocket, come on dog, red rocket."

The dog ejaculates.

Stan: "Whoa cool!"

Kyle: "That's awesome."

Eric: "I told you guys."

Stan: "I had no idea dogs made milk, do it again."

Eric: "Dumb ass, you can only milk a dog once every few hours.  It doesn't work if you beat off a dog right away."

Kyle: "You beat off?"

Eric: "That's what it's called when you milk a dog, beating off.  Don't you guys know anything?"

ORAL SEX

South Park– Comedy Central  7/11/01

Eric is in a field trying to train a pony to bite Scott's penis off.  He has a scarecrow with a fake penis and encourages the pony to bite it.

Eric: "Come and get it.  Come on pony, bite the wiener, bite it.  Come on, good pony.  That's it, now bite it!  Bite it off!  Bite off the wiener. Oh no, he'll like that."

The pony starts licking and sucking the fake penis.

Jimbo: "Eric, are you training that pony to please you?"

Eric: "No, I'm trying to train it to bite someone's penis off."

The pony lovingly sucks the fake penis.

Eric: "Not like that, pony!"

Sex and the City - TBS 7/27/04

Samantha: "James has, you know, a small one."

Charlotte: "Is he a good kisser?"

Samantha: "Who cares?  His dick is like a gherkin.  I feel so terrible!  I'm a bad person."

Carrie: "Oh look, we've all been there."

Miranda: "That's for sure.  I was once with a guy the size of one of those little golf pencils.  I didn't know if he was trying to have sex with me or erase me."

Miranda: "Let's not lose perspective; there are ways to work around this."

Charlotte: "…How is he with his tongue?"

Rescue Me – FX 9/01/04

Siletti: "...Paula's older, but she's great.  She's the person who taught me how to please a woman...I mean sexually.    She taught me how to do the Venus Butterfly."

Tommy: "What the hell's that?"

Siletti: "It's a sexual thing, a position, I guess."

Tommy: "And?"

Siletti: "So, you're doin' oral on a chick... So you start with just the tongue, and you put your fingers in her area, and you have another finger workin' the other area."

Sean: "…So what, you put two fingers in the front and one in the back, how does that work?"

Siletti: "It's easy." He gestures with his middle and index finger and pinky.   The ring finger is bent.

Sean: "...This actually works?"

Siletti: "Oh yeah, never fails, drives chicks crazy."

Sean: "I'm doin' it."

Nip/Tuck – FX 6/29/04

Christian is shown standing up, moaning, and shirtless.

It seems he's receiving oral sex.

Christian: "Oh yeah, slow it down, that's better.  Now use both hands…. And don't be afraid to use that, either, sweetheart."

Girl: "It might help more if you paid me a little attention first."

Christian: "First come, first served.  Why didn't you say so?"

He lays back on the bed and the camera pulls back.  The girls is shown fully nude from the back.  She crawls up on the bed with Christian.

Christian: "Saddle up."

She moves forward and straddles his face below the camera line.

She holds a pillow in front of her breasts as she he performs oral sex on her.

She moans with pleasure, then looks panicked. 

Girl: "Oh my God!

Christian (voice muffled): "You like that, don't you, huh?"

Girl: "Down!"

Christian: "Sweetheart, I can't go down any further than I already am."

Christian latter appears at work with a bandage on his nose.  When his assistant asks him what happened, he says, "The model that was sitting on my face this morning jammed her entire pussy…."

The Shield - FX 4/6/04

Vic and two guys from the strike team enter a house looking for Diego.  They walk in on Diego performing oral sex on his girlfriend.  The girl is lying on her back totally naked with her legs spread apart.  Diego's head is between her legs near her crotch.  She is covering her breasts with one arm.  Diego is in his boxer shorts.  When Vic and the others enter, she pulls back and covers herself.

THREESOMES

Real World XII: Las Vegas - MTV    9/24/02

Trishelle begins a sexual relationship with housemate Steven on only their second day in the house.  In a camera confessional, her roommate Brynn complains about having to listen to Trishelle and Steven being intimate in the next bed, but adds that she wouldn't mind partaking in some activity with both of them.  Later in the episode, the housemates are all out at a club together.  Brynn, Trishelle, and Steven are all intoxicated.  On the dance floor of the club, Brynn and Trishelle kiss passionately.  Later that night, they return to the house and the three of them are in a hot tub together, the girls in skimpy bikinis, Steve in swimming trunks.  The three of them are kissing, touching, and fondling one another.  Later, the activity moves to the bedroom.  Trishelle, wearing only a towel, is in bed with Steven who is also wearing only a towel. Brynn goes into to room and climbs on top of them in bed.  One of the girls can be heard saying, "Oh, my gosh!  This is so naked!"

Rescue Me – FX 9/01/04

Siletti goes to the apartment of Andrew's girlfriend to apologize for turning down their offer for a ménage a trois.  He and Geneva end up kissing and falling to the bed.  She takes off his shirt and gives him Viagra.

Siletti: "Oh...I don't need Viagra."

Geneva: "Well, how many times can you go without it?  ‘Cause if the number is less than five, you're gonna need it."

Siletti and Geneva are in bed; he kisses her chest (she is still in her bra), and moves down her body, she moans and then cuffs him to the bed.

Siletti: "Whoa, I'm not into anything too kinky."  Andrew, Geneva's boyfriend comes out of the closet, naked, holding a camera.

Andrew: "Well, that's too bad."  His naked buttocks are in the frame.  "Looks like you're ready to go again, mister.  Don't let me stop you."

Siletti: "I meant what I said...I'm not really into the whole three way thing."

Andrew: "Really? (looking down the bed)  By the looks of things, you could have fooled me."

Siletti: "Hey, that's the Viagra!"

Andrew: "Why are we even talking?  We should be doing some other things.  Hi, Sweetie." He kisses Geneva and gets on the bed, behind her and grabs Siletti's arm and holds it down.  "She's so sweet, isn't she? How can you resist her Mikey?  I couldn't."  Mike asks Geneva for help, but she just covers his mouth.

Nip/Tuck – FX 9/9/03

Matt, a high-schooler, is in bed with Vanessa and Ridley.  Both girls are naked, and are shown sitting on the bed from behind.  Vanessa appears to be fondling Matt's penis. 

Nip/Tuck – FX 8/17/04

Sean and Christian have a ménage a trois with a prostitute.  They are shown in various permutations and positions. 

ANAL SEX

Insomniac with Dave Attell – Comedy Central 9/9/01

Dave talks to two teenaged boys about sodomy.  The boys look to be about 13 to 16-years-old. 

Boy 1: "I thought sodomy was illegal, man."

Dave: "Do you know what it is?"

Boy 1: "Butt sex."

Dave: "That's alright; you can say it proudly with the chin up.  Anal sex."

Boy 1: "Butt [bleeped ‘fucking']."

Dave: "Butt [bleeped ‘fucking'].  I know, butt [bleeped ‘fucking'] sounds like an event in the Olympics.  Not yet.  It's also oral sex.  Am I right?"

Boy 1: "Oral sex?"

Dave: "Yeah, balls on the chin."

Boy 2: "My balls, your chin."

Boy 1: "[Bleeped ‘rim'] jobs? Are we talking about [bleeped ‘rim'] jobs?"

Dave: "[Bleeped ‘rim'] jobs?  There's no better way to wake up than a [Bleeped ‘rim'] job.  Everybody say ‘sodomy.'"

Boys: "Sodomy."  

Ren and Stimpy: Adult Party Cartoon – SPIKE TV          6/26/03

Ren and Stimpy are tiny vermin living inside a drunk's mouth.  They are about to go to sleep when Stimpy starts making eyes at Ren, then reaches over to rub his back.

Ren: "I'm sorry, Stimpy, but I'm just too damn tired tonight.  I just got to get some sleep.  Bugger off, okay?"

Later, as Ren and Stimpy are asleep, the sleeping man's uvula begins to swing up and down with his snoring.  It gets longer and longer until it hits Ren in the buttocks.  It continues to do this, settling between the cleavage in Ren's buttocks in a kind of licking motion, then snapping back.  Ren wakes up and slaps Stimpy, then grabs him by the neck.

Ren: "What did I just tell you?  Who's the pitcher, who's the catcher?"

Stimpy: "You're the pitcher, I'm the catcher.  You're the pitcher, I'm the catcher."

Stimpy looks at Ren changing behind a screen. 

Stimpy: "Say, Ren.  Do you think we could… you're probably too tired again."

Ren is standing beside the screen in a baseball uniform throwing a ball in the air.  "Are you ready for a speedball, my little blumpkin pumpkin?"

Stimpy, now dressed in a catcher's uniform, turns and points his buttocks at Ren.  Ren throws the ball hard at the hole in the catcher's mitt attached to Stimpy's buttocks.  Stimpy is sent flying into the bed.  Ren dives in after him and they bounce around the bed beneath the sheets.

Sex and the City - TBS                     6/29/04

Charlotte Samantha, Carrie, and Miranda talk about Brian's request for their relationship in a cab.

Charlotte (quoting Brian): "We've been seeing each other for a couple of weeks, I really like you, tomorrow night after dinner, I'd like us to have anal sex."

Samantha: "All I'm saying is this is a physical expression that the body is designed to experience.  And P.S., it's fabulous… All I'm saying is, with the right guy and the right lubricant..."

Suddenly there is a harsh stop in the car and their bodies are thrown forward.

Charlotte: "What was that?"

Samantha, Carrie, and Miranda all at once: "A preview!"

Striperella – SPIKE TV 7/3/03

Female talk-show host, Sally Rose: "So, Striperella, you've always been outspoken in your support for animal rights."

Striperella: "Yeah, I've just started a new charity called Animals Need Universal Support, or ANUS."

Sally: "Anytime you want to plug ANUS on my show, I'll be more than happy to have you."

Striperella – SPIKE TV

Striperella: "You guys have made like, seven molds of my ass.  What happened to the one you just made?"

Hal: "Bernard took it home and he, uh, he broke it."

Nip/Tuck – FX 10/14/03

Sean walks in on Escobar having sex with his girlfriend.  It is very graphic.  We see Escobar thrusting into her from behind.  She is gyrating with him.  The woman is naked and her naked breasts can be seen.  Escobar: "Now you watch this and realize that if I wanted it, this could be your wife."  Escobar resumes having sex with the girl from behind while Sean watches.

KINKY SEX AND FETISHES

Nip/Tuck – FX 8/24/04

Sean has sex with the Kimber Henry sex doll prototype.  He uses the doll to engage in oral, anal, and vaginal sex.  While having sex with the doll, he sometimes imagines it is his estranged wife, Julia.  She is facing away from him, as he penetrates her from behind.  She looks pained and asks him to stop as his thrusts become more forceful and violent.  Later that evening, Kimber comes over and realizes what he's done.  The two have sex.

Insomniac with Dave Attell  – Comedy Central   8/19/01

Announcer at Stinky's Peep Show: "How many people enjoy it when you see fine European cuisine eaten out of the crotch of a 300 pound hot dog by two underage girls?"

Two girls in school uniforms and pigtails gyrate on stage.  Customers put money in the waist bands of their skirts to watch them suggestively lick baguettes and simulate oral sex.  An overweight man in a hot dog costume eats whipped cream off of one woman's stomach; then the women grind against each other while sitting on his lap.  The man in the hot dog costume gets down on his hands and knees while one of the girls grinds against his buttocks.

Nip/Tuck – FX 9/9/03

Mia: "Think of the scene as a sexual buffet, with the finest of gourmet  foods. You can eat all you want or you can nibble. For your protection each of the rooms comes with a complete array of condoms."

Kimber: "Rooms?"

Mia: "Pleasure chambers. Orgy. Voyeur. Role play. Girl on girl."

We see people having sex on the floor of one the rooms. We can see what looks like a woman on top of another woman. The woman on top is wearing a thong and we can see her buttocks.

Troy takes Kimber to the girl on girl room. Women are in thongs, where you can see the buttocks of multiple women. Women are kissing. Woman: "Can she come out and play."

This woman is referring to Kimber, and obviously wants to have sex with her.

The woman escorts Kimber over to a couch where she kisses Kimber. She then places Kimber's hand on her breast. Kimber looks uncomfortable at first, like she is doing this for Troy, but then she removes the other woman's top. We see the woman start kissing Kimber's chest and then she goes down to her knees. It is implied that they are about to engage in oral sex.  Kimber and a woman are making out. We can see this woman's buttocks in a thong, grinding on top of Kimber. Troy is watching. It is implied that the woman is giving oral sex to Kimber. Kimber looks like she is enjoying it.

STATUTORY RAPE

Nip/Tuck – FX 8/3/04

Matt, a teenager, has sex with Ava, his middle aged life coach.  She is on top of him in bed and they both pant heavily and appear to climax.  Ava rolls off of him.

Ava's teenaged son, Adrian is standing in the room, watching his mother in bed with Matt, (who is Adrian's age).

Adrian: "What would be great is if you could come quicker so I could get some rest."

SADISM/MASOCHISM

Insomniac with Dave Attell – Comedy Central   10/14/01

Dave goes to a fetish bar.  A woman whips another woman's bare buttocks with a whip.  There is a woman with her breasts hanging out of a leather S&M outfit (they are partially blurred).  A woman is in a hammock with her legs spread and her partner whips her crotch and later is shown whipping her buttocks again.

Dave: "Spank her ass."

The bar owner is asked to describe the weirdest thing he's seen, "A guy getting [bleeped ‘fucked'] by a snake."

BESTIALITY

South Park the Movie: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut – Comedy Central 10/23/04

A cue card with the phrase "horse fuckers" on it shows a cartoon picture of a man with his crotch up against a horse's anus.

South Park – Comedy Central 11/20/02

Mr. Garrison puts Mr. Slave over a desk and shoves a glass tube into Mr. Slave's rectum.

Garrison: "Now I'm going to put the glass tube into Mr. Slave's tight ass."

Mr. Slave: "Ow!"

Garrison: "Okay, now Butters, could you bring over Lemmiwinks [a gerbil] please?"

Butters: "Sure!"

Stan: "Oh, no! No! No! No! No! No!"

Garrison: "Now what do you think is going to happen when I introduce the element of the gerbil to the endothermic heat of Mr. Slave's ass?  Well let's see.

Mr. Garrison inserts the gerbil into the glass tube in Mr. Slave's rectum. The gerbil goes into Mr. Slave's rectum and is shown trapped inside when the sphincter muscle closes.  Inside Mr. Slave's rectum are the skeletal remains of another gerbil.

INCEST

Ava kisses her teenaged son.  He begs her to have sex with him, saying "Please, mommy, please."  The two passionately kiss, it is suggested that they go on to have sex.

Adrian puts his arms around his mother and asks her to take her clothes off. 

Ava: "Stop it!  Stop humiliating yourself.  If you have a sexual urge, masturbate."

FORCED SODOMY/RAPE

Woman: "Go ahead and whack me you cracker prick!"

Shane throws the woman down on the bed and acts as though he's going to rape her.

Shane: "You and me, we're about to get real acquainted here, if you don't start remembering. "

Woman: "Don't touch me! Let go of me!"

Curtis: "Damn it!  Open the door!"

Shane: "Baby, let's just let my dick do the talking, huh?  How about that, huh?"

Shane unbuttons his pants.

Curtis through the door: "Open the goddamn door!  Shane, come on!"

Shane gets off the woman and her naked buttocks are shown. 

Shane: "You have no idea what you just missed, darlin'."

Woman: "Asshole!"

Mike goes to sleep, but Andy turns the light back on; he's in his shorts, but the bulge indicates he has an erection.  He tells Mike he isn't gay

Andy: "You're the first guy I've ever had a hard on for...literally..."

Mike pushes him away, but Andy tells him he just wants to thank him

"Just pretend I'm the Mick, Mike." Mike hits him, but Andy head-butts him. "I'm gonna be Mickey Mantle, and you can be whoever you want to be, Nomar...or even Bobby goddamn Orr."  They've been watching a documentary on Mickey Mantle.

"Tell you what… I'll play the broad...I'll take it in the ass, and you can be the guy..."  He's dragging Mike to the bed, but Mike takes a bat and hits him in the back.

The Shield – FX 4/6/04

"You ever suck a dick like a cell bitch, cop man?"

Gang member: "Open up, sweetheart."

A gang member forces Acaveda, the police chief, to perform oral sex on him at gun point.

The gang member is shown standing from behind.  His pants appear to be loose, and falling off his waist.  Aceveda is on his knees on the ground in front of him.  The gang member is holding the gun on Aceveda and is making slight grunting noises.

A gang member forces Acaveda, the police chief, to perform oral sex on him at gun point.

The camera angle changes, so that we're watching the scene from the side. Aceveda's head is blocked by a sofa, but we can see a head just barely above the sofa.  The gang member has one hand on the back of the head and appears to be moving it back and forth.

Gang member: "Put your groove into it.  Suck it!"

The camera angle changes again, and we can see Aceveda from behind.  His head pulls away, he coughs and spits, gagging.

Gang member, laughing: "A little bigger than you're used to?"

With his gun on Aceveda's jaw, he directs Aceveda's head back to his penis.

Gang member: "Mmmm...Yeah, just like that."

Again, his hand is on Aceveda's head, and we can see it moving back and forth rhythmically.

Gang member: "Get your phone, man.  I want to get a Kodak of this."

To Aceveda, "Yeah, that's the way."  Licking his lips, "Mmm.  Okay.  You ready?"

The first gang member screams as he ejaculates into Acaveda's mouth while his friend takes the picture.


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