TBS and Tedious "Sex"
once called women the "fairer sex," the civilizers
of men, the paragons of reticence and manners. Then
along came feminism, which promised women that they,
too, could be loutish, horny, greedy, and profane.
Today, that perspective is not just stylish, it's
the toast of television.
and the City" is the media-darling series on that
sleazy media-darling channel HBO, which could stand
for Horny, Bawdy, and Obnoxious. Now that the
pay-cable channel's original episodes are finished,
HBO has cashed in some more by selling a slightly
edited version of the show to TBS. A whole new
audience that doesn't pay premium prices for soft
porn now can get the same slutty product, diluted –
with a little less nudity and the word "freaking"
where the obscenity used to be.
LATEST LOWLIGHTS FROM SEX AND THE CITY
Sex and the City on TBS Episode Synopsis:
Airs Tuesday at 9:00 EST on TBS
Miranda's baby Brady
starts chewing on the condom package.
Samantha: "Oh, honey, relax, I have those in my mouth all the time."
Richard gives Samantha a pearl thong as a gift. It has a string of pearls in
the place where the crotch would go. She holds them up and comments: "Oh you
naughty boy! Practical and stimulating, what will they think of next?"
Charlotte, embarrassed and nervous by all their making out, chatters on
about her knitting.
Richard: "Maybe later if you're good, I'll give you pearl necklace to
She giggles and they kiss.
Charlotte: "My father gave me the most beautiful pearl necklace for my sweet
Samantha: "Actually we're talking about the other kind of pearl necklace.
You know, the kind where the guy decorates your neck?"
Carrie says that she had bad sex the night before and that is why her neck
and back hurts.
Carrie: "This is a sex sprain."
Stanford: "Good for you!"
Carrie: "No, it was not good for me! It was jack rabbit sex, you know,
Stanford: "Are straight men still allowed to do that?"
Carrie: "No they aren't. It's bad, it's basically masturbating with a woman
instead of your hand. I don't enjoy."
Samantha is with Jerry. He is
laying on her bed in nothing but underpants. She
comes to the bed in a maid costume with whipped cream in a can on a tray and
tells him she is there to serve him. Then
she puts whipped Cream on his chest.
Samantha: "When you're a waiter, you must always be aware that the customer
comes first. It's a hard, hard, job."
she lifts the waistband of his underpants and squirts some of the whipped
Samantha is shown in her bed, getting ready to masturbate with a large
Carrie's voiceover: "After a grueling day which included leg, eyebrow and bikini
waxes, Samantha decided to reward herself with a night of R&R. Unfortunately,
her favorite vibrator needed a little CPR."
Samantha bangs it against the nightstand and then gets angry when it won't work.
Samantha goes to a store to ask about her broken vibrator.
Samantha: "I'd like to return this vibrator."
Store Clerk: "We don't sell vibrators."
Samantha: "Yes you do, I bought this here six months ago." (She holds up the
Clerk: "That's not a vibrator, that's a neck massager."
Samantha: "No, it's a vibrator."
Clerk: "Sharper Image doesn't sell vibrators. It's a neck massager."
Clerk: "What's wrong with it?"
Samantha: "It failed to get me off. It has a warranty and it just stopped. It
made the saddest little sound."
Clerk: "Perhaps you wore it out?"
Samantha: "Well, honey, it wouldn't be the first one."
Woman 1 to Woman 2: "I think that actually is a back massager."
Samantha: "Not if you mount it."
Woman 1 holds up another one.
Samantha: "No, absolutely not, that one will burn your thing off."
Brady's vibrating baby chair is broken and Samantha's solution is to put her
vibrator in the chair with him and he is happy again.
Miranda comes home and sees it and says: "That had better be brand new."
Samantha says that she thinks that Miranda's baby sounds like an "asshole."
Samantha scratches her crotch. She says she is growing out her pubic hair
because: "Smith likes a full bush."
Harry walks through the house naked, singing and his bare buttocks are visible
twice. Charlotte follows him and is shocked to see him sitting on her white
furniture, nude. Then there are other clips of him nude walking around the house
without clothes on. He is shown sitting nude at the computer, buttocks partially
visible, and leaning against the counter nude, with the side of his buttocks
Samantha and Carrie talk as they walk through a lingerie store.
Samantha: "Hi, I need something that will make a guy explode in his pants the
minute he sees me."
Carrie: "You talk to sales people like that?"
Samantha: "I come here all the time, they love me."
Carrie: "Is this for a specific gentleman, or do you just look for that
Samantha: "It's for that hot waiter from Raw, I'm sleeping with him tonight, but
he doesn't know it yet."
Episode Summary Archive